Or, we throw casual dating out the window and expect to marry the first person we date right off the bat. Aristotle said that virtue is the mean between two extremes. Thomas Umstattd wrote a great article in defense of casual dating; he argued that courtship (which made a comeback in Christian culture with the book by Joshua Harris) puts too much pressure on people to marry the first person they court because it’s taken so seriously.Casual dating offers this mean: men and women go on lots of dates with different people for the purpose of getting to know each other. We reclaim Halloween, which celebrates death, by celebrating the vigil of All Saints Day, or “All Hallows Eve.” Popes have exhorted us to use the media for the glory of God. With casual dating, there’s less temptation, more interaction, more self-awareness and honestly, more fun.I know I should relax and open myself up to vulnerability, so I can learn to enjoy dating more in the future. Tim insisted on being a gentleman and paying for dinner, which was very sweet of him, but I want to get the next one. How do you feel about this relationship/project right now? I know I don’t have as much savings as he does, but I’ve always supported myself financially, and I don’t mind spending on great experiences. I was wondering the whole time during therapy, “Wait, why are we doing this?! I was thinking about some of my buddies who are in a relationship that doesn’t completely stimulate them. The characters are either opportunistic, self-serving, entitled, indulgent, or power-seeking.The new Justin Timberlake album came out yesterday and it’s totally got me in the mood … I don’t place value on the size of someone’s bank account or material possessions. ” As Jocelyn said today, “emotions know no project boundaries.” Is there anything that you want to do differently? I was texting with one of my best friends, Greg in Chicago, and he told me to just have fun with it. So many men and women accept this standard, it’s no wonder why half of all marriages end in divorce. Tim found it difficult to empathize with any of the characters in the play as there was no “hero” character. After the play, we wandered over to a bar nearby in the West Village for a drink.It’s not hard to look around and notice that there’s a problem with today's dating scene. Ultimately, the purpose of dating is to eventually get married; so in that sense, we can’t date willy-nilly and play with people’s hearts. Hooking up is wrong because it’s totally selfish: we use another person for our own pleasure. Catholics tend to take this approach — taking dating far too seriously.Maybe this leads to a deeper relationship, maybe it doesn’t.
I wonder if that is part of the reason I am always trying to find the right person and why I feel like such failure when a relationship doesn’t work out. Jessie is currently in therapy, so it’s all good with her too.
We have to be bold and clear with the other person of our intentions.
Still, we have a tendency to take dating so seriously that we never even make it on a date!
Well, she and I ended up talking about this Forty Days of Dating project the entire time. She asked us straight away if Tim and I were attracted to each other. He almost had a panic attack when I sent him a list of date ideas for the next week! Love is not a matter of the heart, it’s all in our brain. I think it was a bit soon for this, but our therapist Jocelyn wanted to have a consultation first. Jocelyn hit us with a TON of questions that I’m not sure either of us were prepared to talk about so quickly with her: 1. It was cute that Tim insisted on being a gentleman and walking me home after the play. How much does it suck to see someone read your text and then they don’t write back? However, Jessie and I have something planned on Sunday, so it was probably best to do a date tonight instead of Saturday night. The things you learn about someone that you think you know. How do you feel about this relationship/project right now? Tonight was the first time things felt date-y and I felt okay about it.
This is something we’ve never discussed, although we have been flirtatious with each other in the past. Chemicals like dopamine and norepinephrine are released when in love. When I have a crazy day at work, I often forget to check my cell phone. Anyway, we went to the Off-Broadway play, Did anything interesting happen? Jessie told me some very personal stuff that’s happened in her life. Apparently she doesn’t check her texts much, which I somehow did not know. The intimate talk and the crisp spring air made our walk home feel a bit romantic. Well I certainly won’t text her if I need to get a hold of her. I think Jessie caught me looking at the Knicks score on my phone during the play.